Tuesday, August 7, 2007
Newsbreaks for Tuesday (Kids and McDonalds)
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A new study from the Stanford School of Medicine shows that preschoolers prefer the taste of food when they think it comes from McDonald’s. So just to update you, the score stands at Satan 453 trillion, parents zero.
When presented with the same exact food, the lead researcher said, “the kids actually thought the McDonald’s food tasted better.” That’s pretty striking. But what’s amazing is they thought the McDonald’s food tasted like food.
This study surprises no one who’s been around small children, all of whom would sell their father into slavery for a Happy Meal, if that were possible. (And rest assured, one day that will be possible.) That little kids are susceptible to marketing is not the depressing part. The depressing part is we never get any less susceptible. “No, dear, we’re not getting McDonald’s. Mommy has to go get her Wonderbra.”
The study was meant to highlight the growing problem of childhood obesity—emphasis on the ‘growing’—as if being knee-deep in huge-ass kids wasn’t enough. I’ve seen toddlers one could only classify as “gas giants.”
Fact is, this problem would be easy to solve if we really wanted to solve it. Is it any wonder that the kids in the study were all low-income? That’s not a cheeseburger, kid—it’s class warfare. And you’re lovin’ it.
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aha. ...Shameless Parody arrived today! I noticed in the book it mentions you wrote a Philip Pullman parody, is that true? Where can i get it?
ReplyDeleteseriously hope that the aliens kidnap
ReplyDeleteyou.......THIS PLANET WOULD BE FREE FROM ONE HECKUVA ASS
Jesus sends his regards
:P
Sam, unfortunately that's just a joke title--though enough people have asked about it, I probably should've written a spoof of Pullman. Maybe I still will.
ReplyDeleteOh, Aditya, don't you see? Other, bigger asses would step up and take my place...Say hi to Da Big Jeez for me.
Great one, Mike!
ReplyDeleteI was rolling during the gas giant part.
I've been reading some of your comments and I must say, the Jesus freaks come out of hiding for you! I must have seen the "you're going to burn in hell" comment I don't know how many times. If these people are so offended by what you say, why don't they go to a different website? Or, better yet, how about they become Amish so the evils of "teh interwebz" won't reach thier fragile minds?
Good work, Mike!
You should do a Pullman parody, there's a film coming out soon...CASH IN TIME!
ReplyDeleteAnd Aditya Darling, you're on an authors website, so you're familiar with fictional characters, Jesus is as real as Barry Trotter is.