The Hogwash School for Wizards was the most famous school in the wizarding world, and Barry Trotter was its most famous student. His mere presence made sure that every year twenty candidates applied for every open spot, no matter how rapacious Hogwash's tuition became. As a result, Barry and the school had come to an unspoken agreement: regardless of his grades, Barry could remain at Hogwash for as long as he wished. He had just begun his eleventh year...
Sleepy with boredom and gassy from lunch, Hart Fox sat in the hard plastic chair outside his dean's office. A kid walked in the door, pink detention slip in hand, bobbing his head a little so that the purple spikes of his mohawk didn't get bent on the transom. He slumped down next to Hart. Hart nodded--he remembered tis joker from sophomore American History, constantly arguing in favor of anarcho-syndicalism. Was his name Henry?...
Arcing lazily through the air, the Frisbee smacked against the window. “Ooo-oo!” a chiseled and shirtless boy teased as it wobbleplummeted to the ground. “Sarah's in troub-le!”The beauty-boy was righter than he knew: Of all the windows on campus to hit, this one was the worst. It belonged to Stutts’ Professor of Clandestine Affairs, Glenbard North, who had destroyed more students than there were blades of grass on the freshly resodded Old Quad below...
All you really gotta know is, I'm writing new things constantly and the more I write, the better my books get. So if you've read my earlier work--and millions of you have--we should keep in touch. This fall, at least one and maybe two new books will be available: a Dickens parody AND a comic mystery loosely based on The Beatles. Drop me an email at mikesnewbooks[at]gmail[dot]com, and I'll be sure to let you know release dates, special deals, etc.Monday, September 16, 2002
Wake Up, Detroit!
Wouldn't it be cool if instead of honking, car horns could play a snippet of audio? Sure, "sosumi" at 18-wheeler volume would be awful, but I look forward to hearing Krusty's maniacal laugh or Al Pacino's "Hoo-hah!" Maybe someday, when somebody lets you into traffic, you can have Elvis tell them, "Thankyavurrymuch."
By the way, some of you might have seen the headline "Porn Site Offers $3m for Napster." All I have to say is, this isn't a porn site, it's a blog, and there's no way a complete set of 1978 Topps Football cards is worth $3 mil.
By the way, some of you might have seen the headline "Porn Site Offers $3m for Napster." All I have to say is, this isn't a porn site, it's a blog, and there's no way a complete set of 1978 Topps Football cards is worth $3 mil.
